Sometimes the words have to come……..

I’ve been stuck for a good while now with not being able to get my thoughts out of my head.  They’ve been stuck between my head and my fingers.  A few weeks ago I started two new life groups (think Bible and Christian life studies).  Some of my thoughts poured out at one of the groups but I still couldn’t get them to come out very coherently.  Then this week an internet friend told me to get my camera out and take some pictures.  She’s one of the people who get that sometimes the pictures speak to me.  Today, I took the opportunity to do just that.  I took the day off from work and went to visit Brittany in the hospital in St. Louis.  She’s there being monitored with goals on her patient board being, “Stay pregnant, no fever, no contractions.”  So far she’s doing 2 out 3 very successfully and the 3rd ones improving.  But I got home and God was providing the scenes I needed to picture.

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This was the scene that greeted me when I pulled in the drive and God was speaking loudly to me.  The storm clouds were gathered but it wasn’t storming.  They just sat there for over an hour.  And that white cloud at the top stayed there.  I think most people know the storms in our lives.  Our daughter-in-law and son, Brittany and Jesse, are expecting twin girls.  Their actual due date is July 9th or 10th but they are likely delivering sooner than later.  While the girls are identical they aren’t.  As their prenatal doctor at Cardinal Glennon says, “Each of your kiddos has a very different story.”  One baby has some significant difficulties.  The other doesn’t seem to have such significant issues.  We won’t know how the next chapter will be written until they arrive.  And while we would love to have them hang out until July in the womb it looks like that chapter will be written soon.  We’ve become so attached to these little girls and yet have never met them.  The white cloud in the picture symbolizes God to me.  He’s watching over us, over the storm and we know He’s got it all in His control.  And yes, we know that our ways are not always His ways.  We know the outcome we would like and we know what the medically predicted outcome is and we know those are not one and the same.  But what we know and rely on is the fact that God is holding ALL of us in His perfect peace.

Then there’s the dandelions.  These weeds drive me crazy this time of year.  They pop up and make my yard look unkept quickly.  I got the front yard mowed last night but didn’t get the back yard where I found these done.  I read a post today about perspective in regards to dandelions.  While they’re a weed they also have a certain beauty.  I see another perspective.  The first dandelion is the image we all try to put out there as a public face.  We’ve got it all together….life’s perfect….no problems here.  The second picture is what we really look like as we’re going through a storm.  Worn, beaten, battered.  A little bit of fluff stays attached but we’re just barely hanging in.  Then I zoomed out.  I don’t know about you, but I have so many amazing friends and family that surround me and support me through life’s storms.  To me they’re both the fluffy and the golden dandelions.  I’m that weed in the middle being supported and surrounded and protected by them.  And I’m thankful – very thankful, for that support and love and grace.

So that is what came out of my picture session tonight.  Finally a break in the dam of thoughts in my mind.

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